Season 11

Look Me Over
October 25, 1982
Written by Alan Alda
Directed by Susan Oliver
Guest Stars: Kelleye Nakahara, Peggy Feury, Perry Lang, Deborah Harmon
Hawkeye watched Nurse Kellye brighten a wounded GI's final moments and comes to appreciate the nurses' vital contribution to the healing process.

Trick or Treatment
November 1, 1982
Written by Dennis Koenig
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: George Wendt, Richard Lineback, Andrew Clay, James Lough
The 4077th Halloween party hosts an unexpected guest after Father Mulcahy works an apparent miracle during the reading of a soldier's last rites.

Foreign Affairs
November 8, 1982
Written by David Pollock and Elias Davis
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: Melinda Mullins, Jeffrey Tambor, Soon Teck Oh, Byron Chung
The Army tries to get a North Korean pilot to defect; and Charles gets a rude shock when he falls for a French nurse with an unacceptable past.

The Joker is Wild
November 15, 1982
Written by John Rappaport and Dennis Koenig
Directed by Burt Metcalfe
Guest Stars: Clyde Kusatsu, David Haid
Hawkeye's guard is up when BJ threatens to pull off the most elaborate practical joke in the compound's history.

Who Knew?
November 22, 1982
Written by David Pollock and Elias Davis
Directed by Harry Morgan
Guest Stars: Kellye Nakahara, Enid Kent
Hawkeye volunteers to deliver the eulogy for a dead nurse and belatedly discovers her deep feelings for him.

Bombshells
November 28, 1982
Written by Dan Wilcox and Thad Mumford
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: Gerald O'Laughlin, Allen Williams, Stu Charno
Charles and Hawkeye start a rumor that Marilyn Monroe plans to visit the 4077th; and BJ feels responsible when he's unable to rescue a wounded soldier.

Settling Debts
December 6, 1982
Written by Dan Wilcox and Thad Mumford
Directed by Mike Switzer
Guest Stars: Guy Boyd, Jeff East
Hawkeye and the crew surprise Colonel Potter with a party to commemorate Mildred's final payment on the couple's mortgage.

The Moon is Not Blue
December 13, 1982
Written by Larry Balmagia
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: Hamilton Camp, Sandy Helberg, Jan Jorden
With the camp facing prohibition and a severe medical-supply shortage during another heat wave, Hawkeye resolves to lift morale by importing a racy new movie.

Run for the Money
December 20, 1982
Written by Mike Farrell, David Pollock, and Elias Davis
Directed by Nell Cox
Guest Stars: Thomas Calloway, Mark Anderson, Phil Brock, William Schilling,Robert Alan Browne
When an Olympic runner assigned to the 4077th fail to materialize, Father Mulcahy must save the camp's honor in a high-stakes footrace against the 8063rd.

U.N., the Night and the Music
January 3, 1983 Written by David Pollock and Elias Davis
Directed by Harry Morgan
Guest Stars: George Innes, Kavi Raz, Dennis Holahan, David Packer
A United Nations delegation tours the 4077th-a Swede, a Hindu, and a British officer-and each leaves a lasting effect on the men and women of the camp.

Strange Bedfellows
January 10, 1983
Written by Karen L. Hall
Directed by Mike Farrell
Guest Stars: Dennis Dugan, Benjamin F. Wilson
The 4077th faces a sleepless night as Charles' snoring keeps BJ and Hawkeye from counting sheep; and Colonel Potter discovers that his son-in-law has had an affair.

Say No More
January 24, 1983
Written by John Rappaport
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: John Anderson, Michael Horton, Chip Johnson, James Karen
A military strategist refuses to accept responsibility for the war games that have mortally wounded his own son; and Margaret develops laryngitis.

Friends and Enemies
February 7, 1983
Written by Karen L. Hall
Directed by Jamie Farr
Guest Stars: John McLiam
Colonel Potter must decide whether to blow the whistle on an old army chum whose military follies are costing boys their lives.

Give and Take
February 14, 1983
Written by Dennis Koenig
Directed by Charles S. Dubin
Guest Stars: Craig Wasson, G.W. Bailey, Derek Wong
A wounded GI learns a painful lesson when he forms a recovery room friendship with the enemy soldier he's critically wounded.

As Time Goes By
February 21, 1983
Written by Dan Wilcox and Thad Mumford
Directed by Burt Metcalfe
Guest Stars: Rosalind Chao, G.W. Bailey, Michael Swan, Mark Herrier, Jeff Maxwell
Hawkeye and Margaret encapsulate the breadth of their wartime experience when they bury souvenirs as a reminder for future generations.

Goodbye, Farewell and Amen
February 28, 1983
Written by Alan Alda, Burt Metcalfe, John Rappaport, Thad Mumford, Dan Wilcox, David Pollock, Elias Davis,and Karen Hall
Directed by Alan Alda
Guest Stars: Allan Arbus, Rosalind Chao,G.W. Bailey, Shari Saba, Jeff Maxwell, Gwen Farrell, Kellye Nakahara, Roy Goldman

Although reports that the war is almost over reach the camp with increasing frequency, the 4077th is still full with refugees and prisoners of war. Fresh casualties pour in as both sides try to gain ground before the armistice. A deeply troubled Hawkeye has been sent away to the psychiatric hospital where Dr. Sidney Freedman tries to help him find the cause of his breakdown, which is associated with a tragic incident on a trip back from R & R at the beach.

Other members of the unit are coping with the final days of war, and making plans to get out. Hot Lips' father is trying to find her a glamorous Army post. BJ is determined to make it back for his daughters birthday. Charles wants a plum appointment at a Boston hospital. Klinger worries about Soon-Lee's attempts to find her parents. The normal business of the camp is interrupted by a runaway Army tank that crashes into the compound and destroys the half-built latrine.

With two results. First, Charles wanders off to relieve himself and stumbles on a group of Chinese musicians. They surrender and come back with him to the camp. Second, the enemy spots the tank and begins to shell the base. Father Mulcahy bravely ventures out under fire to release the POWs, a shell explodes near him, and he suffers a mild concussion. When BJ examines him, he detects a hearing loss that Father Mulcahy begs him to keep from the rest of the company.

The barrage continues as the unit fails to move the tank out. Hawk eye returns to the 4077th and is called straight into the O.R. He is urgently needed because BJ has received orders permitting him to go home.
Charles learns that he has been appointed to him Boston hospital but quarrels violently with Hot Lips on discovering that she has pulled strings for him. He consoles himself by teaching the Chinese musicians a little touch of Mozart. Klinger, meanwhile, has brought back a reluctant Soon-Lee to the safety of the camp, although she is still determined to find her parents. He is obviously in love.

The pressure on the company is temporarily relieved when Hawkeye, who has coped successfully with his return to surgery, drives the tank into the 4077th's trash dump. But only temporarily. Fires started by incendiary bombs in the surrounding woods are visible from the camp and Colonel Potter orders evacuation proceedings.

The Colonel's desperate plea for a relief surgeon is answered un- expectedly by the return of BJ, who was already one-third of the way home when the Army recalled him to fulfill the Colonel's staff request. He misses his daughter's birthday, but the company hosts a birthday party for an orphan with B.J. as the guest of honor. Klinger proposes marriage and is accepted by Soon-Lee. He is overjoyed. Charles, however, is not so happy when he loses his "orchestra" to a relocation center.
The end of the war is only hours away, but the casualties keep coming in among them Charles' flutist. Finally, the surgical teams learn of the immediate ceasefire as they operate on a group of desperately wounded soldiers and civilians. The war is over.

At the noisy, joyful camp party that night, members of the company talk about their lives after the war. Colonel Potter looks forward to becoming a semi-retired country doctor. Hot Lips declares she has opted for the States and a big city hospital. Klinger announces his engagement and says that he is staying in Korea to help find Soon-Lee's parents. Charles is still going to Boston, despite Hot Lips' "meddling." B.J., of course, wants to go home, yet refuses to actually say "goodbye" to the others. And Hawkeye? Perhaps, after all, he will not be going to the big city surgical post that he always dreamed of.

After Klinger and Soon-Lee marry and leave the camp in traditional Korean style, the other members of the company depart one by one. By now, the camp is a ghost town. Father Mulcahy leaves to start a new life ministering to the deaf. Hot Lips is kissed and hugged. Even her disagreement with Charles is reconciled. Charles himself exits with Rizzo in a garbage truck. Colonel Potter takes Sophie for one last ride before she is adopted by the orphanage. Finally, B.J. and Hawkeye go together on B.J.'s motorbike to meet Hawkeye's chopper. As Hawkeye looks down over the desolate camp, he sees a message B.J. has left on the pad: a GOODBYE marked out in stone.